The Collected Regrets of Clover

The Collected Regrets of Clover by Mikki Brammer is about a death doula in New York City.

Clover Brooks was raised by her grandfather from age six when her parents died. Clover was sad about her parents, but ready to leave the school where everyone thought she was weird since the day her kindergarten teacher dropped dead during storytime and she was the only kid to not run screaming from the room.

As an adult she is a death doula. Really, she spends little time with those not dying since grandfather died. She spends as much or little time with the dying to help them process anything they want to talk about before their time is up. 

She does need to process these deaths. So she does two things. She keeps journals of people regrets and last words. And she goes to Death Cafes to speak with others who have experienced a loss. 

At one of the cafes, she meets a man who wants to hire her for his grandmother. Grandmother Claudia will be different - she will make Clover want to open up to people more, make her try to face her regrets now, and make other choices. 

Brammer has written a beautiful book about relationships and using time wisely while we have it instead of putting things off that we may regret later. Read this book.

Brammer, Mikki. The Collected Regrets of Clover. New York: St. Martin's Press. 

When We Were Birds

When We Were Birds by Ayanna Lloyd Banwo is the tale of people from two very different backgrounds meeting in Trinidad's largest cemetery. 

Yejide St Bernard grew up listening stories about when the corbeaux (crows) became those who use magic to sooth the dead and keep them still. In her family, one woman in each generation inherits this honor/role.

Darwin grew up Rasta. One of the tenants of his belief is to stay away from death. It is a central belief. But after years of there being no jobs, he takes a job in the city - at the main cemetery. He cuts his hair and becomes a grave digger to help his family survive. 

When Yejide and Darwin meet at the gates of Fidelis Cemetery it will change both of their lives. Banwo has written a beautiful book of love in the time of change. 

Banwo, Ayanna Lloyd. (2022). When We Were Birds. New York: Doubleday. 

Under the Whispering Door

Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune is a love story in death.

Charon's Crossing Tea Shop is a way station on the path of death. Hugo, a ferryman, owns the shop. He serves tea and baked goods to the locals and works with the dead the help them process their lives and death so they may move on.

Mei is a reaper, collecting people after their death and bringing them to the tea shop.

Nelson is an old man / ghost who lives at the tea shop - allowed to stay to help emotionally support Hugo. 

Wallace Price, a lawyer who dies of a heart attack, is found by Mei at his funeral. Almost no one else is in attendance. He was a man who turned off his emotions other than annoyance.

Hugo, Mei and Nelson will have their hands full with Wallace. But it is never too late to grow as a person.

Klune has written a wonderful book that looks at death with love and humor. Everyone should read this.

Klune, TJ. (2021). Under the Whispering Door. New York: Tor.

Crying in H Mart

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner is a memoir of losing a parent and how that leads to her teaching her self to cook Korean food as a cultural pathway to her mother.

Growing up Michelle visited her mother's family in Seoul every other year. They stayed with her grandmother, two aunts and cousins. 

Michelle is most well known as the singer of the band Japanese Breakfast. Which, being Korean American, creates questions each time she is interviewed.

When she looked at her life with her mother she noticed that food was used not just as sustenance but as love. Her mom got sick quickly and did not have time to teach Michelle to cook Korean food. 

Michelle took it upon herself to learn. Using the blog Maangchi, she describes delicious food as she processes her loss and her band's growing popularity. 

Zauner has written a memoir that does not shy away from looking at herself and her family truthfully. She tells the good and bad without glossing over. This is a beautiful book of love, food and grief. 

Zauner, Michelle. (2021). Crying in H Mart. New York: Knopf.

Lies My Girlfiend Told Me

Lies My Girlfriend Told Me by Julie Anne Peters is about a young woman coming to terms with the fact that her girlfriend who just died lied to her about everything.

Alix Van Pelt is having a great junior year. She is in love. Since the school ski trip, she has been dating Swanee Durban - one of the most popular girls in school and star of the track team. But six weeks into their relationship Swan dies. Alix is destroyed. To get some closure she goes to Swan's house and goes into her room for a memento. When she finds Swan's phone, she sees new texts. How can someone not have heard about the death. And who is telling Swan she loves her?

Alix begins to investigate who "LT" is from the phone. LT seems to think she is dating Swan. It seems there is someone Swan lied to more than she lied to Alix. Liana Torres goes to another school almost an hour away.

Alix and Liana have a lot in common. If they can work together they may have a chance to unravel the lies Swan told each of them.

Peters is well known for her young adult novels featuring GLBTQ characters. Lies My Girlfriend Told Me is not so much about Alix and Liana being lesbians, their families accept them from the first page, but the story of grief and renewal. This is Peters' best book yet.

Peters, Julie Anne. (2014). Lies My Girlfriend Told Me. New York: Megan Tingley Books.

Kiss the Morning Star

Kiss the Morning Star by Elissa Janine Hoole is a road trip novel about two young women reconnecting after a tough year. They have just graduated from high school and each have their own reasons for the trip.

Kat wanted to take a road trip across the US like Jack Kerouac in her favorite book, Dharma Bums. Anna agrees to go because since her mother died in a fire, she and her father have been sort of numb and she needs to snap of it. Kat is also hoping that the change of scene will bring her friend back to her.

Hoole's novel is not simply about two friends driving and camping. It is about dealing with loss, regaining a friendship that has suffered, and exploring feelings that have been hidden under the surface. This is a great summer read.

Hoole, Elissa. (2012). Kiss the Morning Star. New York: Marshall Cavendish Publishing.

37 Things I Love

37 Things I Love by Kekla Magoon is a story of loss and friendship.

Ellis is fifteen. She lives with her mother and goes to high school. Her father has been in a coma for two years and, as a result, she and her mother are in a sort of holding pattern - sad and depressed and cannot talk to each other or fully take in what it going on around them.

Ellis's best friend is Abby. They have been friends for years. But lately Ellis is noticing that Abby does not really listen to her. The friendship feels one-sided and Ellis needs someone to talk to. Her mother is talking about pulling the plug on her father's life support.

After walking away from their usual lunch table to get away from Abby, Ellis notices Cara sitting outside. Ellis is not sure what happened - she and Abby and Cara used to all be best friends. When she sits down next to Cara, she feels listened to for the first time in a long time.

37 Things I Love feels like a light read but is filled with deep emotion, the good and bad of friendship, loss and first love. As the story unfolds, readers will be drawn to certain characters and read faster to see what happens to them.

Magoon, Kekla. (2012). 37 Things I Love. New York: Henry Holt and Company.

Deadville

Deadville by Ron Koertge is about learning to live again after a loss.

Ryan is a stoner. He has been one since his little sister went into the hospital to die two years ago. It was his way of coping - or not having to cope.

When a classmate falls off of her horse and ends up in a coma his friend drags him to the hospital to see her. After forcing himself through the door the first time he is compelled to return again and again.

As he visits the hospital he begins to see ways to come out of the cloud he has been living under and begin to take charge of his life.

Ron Koertge captures the feelings of grief and the desire to keep going in a way that will appeal to readers who enjoyed Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson though it is not quite as intense.

Koertge, Ron. (2008). Deadville. Cambridge, MA: Candlewick Press.

TV: Six Feet Under

Six Feet Under is arguably the best show ever aired on television.

The series focuses on the Fisher family - that owns a funeral home. During the pilot, the father of the family is killed in an auto accident. Sons David and Nate have to decide what to do with the family business: David wants to keep it open and Nate has spent his life trying to escape it. Daughter Claire needs to get through high school and find her path. And wife Ruth will have to rethink her role in life.

Every character is well written, fully explored, and beautifully acted. The cast is made up of stage actors who convey emotion better than most on TV or even in movies.

Six Feet Under is revolutionary television not only for the quality but for the emotion and discussion about death that is has sparked. We in the US are notoriously afraid of death when compared to other cultures. This show has changed the way people look at death and those who deal with it daily as a career. No subject is taboo with this show. You will see many social, political, and economic issues played out in a sensitive, thoughtful way, not by using stereotypes or other cheap ploys usually found on TV.

Watch it! It will change the way you think! It is amazing.

Six Feet Under.
Cast:
Francis Conroy
Michael C. Hall
Peter Krause
Lauren Ambrose
Mathew St. Patrick
Rachel Griffiths
Freddy Rodriguez
Justina Machado

Getting Near to Baby

Audrey Couloumbis, author of the Maude March books, won a Newberry honor for this book - Getting Near to Baby.

As with her other two Couloumbis books that I have read, this is the story of two sisters and how their lives are affected by the death of a loved one. She has a way with writing that makes her stories a joy to read.

Willa Jo and Little Sister have been taken to live with their Aunt Patty. As the book begins, the sisters are sitting on the roof of Patty's house watching the sunrise. As the day progresses and neighbors stop by to gawk, a look back in time shows how the sisters got to the roof.

This is a beautiful look at family, sisterhood in particular. Not just Willa and Little Sister, but also their mother and Patty.

Couloumbis, Audrey. (2000). Getting Near to Baby. New York: Puffin Books.